Water, Water Everywhere...!

Every where I turn, I'm being reminded to 'drink water'. Drink more water. Are you drinking enough water? Don't forget to drink more water! OK! OK! I get it ENOUGH ALREADY!

Only in America do we have to force people to do things like drink water and eat less food. Other countries have the opposite problem. They wish they had water to drink, and wish they had more food to eat ...

But here in the land of affluence, we have to be told to eat less and 'drink water'.

The problem is ... water is ... well ... boring! It has no taste. At all. This is probably because water doesn't have any calories. Calories are what give food flavor. Afterall- the more calories there are, the better things taste, not? And vicey-versy ... the less calories the more bleh it tastes!

So, here's my suggestion for encouraging people to dink more water. Actually, there's two of them.

The first is simple. Add sugar. That's right ... good old fashioned sucrose straight from the bowl on your kitchen counter. Keep in mind that sugar has a lot of calories ... so the more you put in, the better it will taste. I suggest 2 to 3 heaping teaspoons per 8 oz. glass of water. You can add more if you wish, but it has a tendency to come out of solution, so you may have to convert sulfuric acid into phosphoric acid to keep the sugar suspended in solution. This is what the big soda companies do, and it seems to work quite well.

You'll also want to add color. A great many studies have been done proving that the more colorful something is, the better it tastes. For instance, M&M's verses cauliflower. No contest, right? Well, color is another thing that water lacks. And adding color is easy. Just get some food color ... like red or yellow dye #5. You can use either one, or combine them to make orange. (Using latex paint is not recommended, although its probably just as healthy for you.)

By adding sugar and coloring, the people you care about will be drinking water like never before!

Another way to prepare water is with malted barley, hops and brewers yeast. This is a little more involved, but the final outcome is a healthy glass of water with all the sugar and color needed to ensure regular consumption. In fact, you may want to consider this: dehydration leads to stiffness. And I can personally testify that the more barley and hops-infused water I drink, the more loose I become.

So - there you have it ...


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